Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Some days, just surviving is pretty enough

The last few days (or possibly the last week...I've sort of lost track) have flattened me out to a pancake. It's super hot here (and I am miserable when it gets to 80F), I strongly disliked my first UCSD Extension class (my own fault for being so rigid), TCB's job comes to an end tomorrow, TCB's father called out of the blue on TCB's 40th birthday to tell him that he's got cancer, and work is ramping up in five different ways.

How hot is it? It was 108F at my house on Tuesday. Hot enough that I skipped yoga class on Monday because it's held in a building with skylights and huge picture windows all around, plus no discernible insulation, so I KNEW it would be over 100F in there at 6:00 pm, so I skipped it. There's $10.63 gone.

Why did I dislike my class? Because, for various reasons, it made me uncomfortable. I was pushed into situations that I am not good at - creative thinking, for one, working with people whose accents I could not understand and who did not pay any mind (to my thinking) - with a professor who I think was being purposefully provocative. I've since come to think that I probably am in need of being pushed out of my comfort zone, whether or not this is a good time for me to grow.

What's up with TCB's job and will you lose your home? The company he works for let him know back in April that they'd be losing their jobs as of September 30. He's been scouring the "Help Wanted" websites, putting in loads of resumes and such, and even been on four interviews in the intervening five months, but so far nothing. We are luckier than most, however, because TCB receives a retirement benefit from his time in the Navy as well as disability pay, also from the Navy, and those combined with my salary will keep us in our home pretty much indefinitely. We definitely need to cut non-essential expenses, but that can't be so hard, can it? (Hardy har har.)

What's wrong with TCB's dad? He has kidney cancer plus spots on his bones and it's spread to his lymph nodes. He started chemotherapy yesterday and I told TCB that, if he wanted to go out to see him that he ought to do it soon. They've not had a close relationship for many years, and it's horrible to see my husband struggling with his feelings about this. He's going to fly out next Tuesday and stay a week...money's tight but family is family.

Work? Eh, it's just the usual craziness for this time of year. If it weren't for everything else, this would be a breeze.

4 comments:

Dawn said...

I'm sorry that you are going through so much right now. I hope things start to look up for you soon.

misspuddingfood.wordpress.com said...

Good luck! I hope his dad has a decent amount of time left. That's rough even if you're not close with your family.

lisah said...

So sorry to hear about everything that is going on. Sending good thoughts your way.

gingersnapper said...

Hoping for the best for all of you...

xoxo