Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Love Your Body

I have a postcard that I bought from The Body Shop while I was in college (late 80s), picturing a plus-size Barbie-type doll reclining on a chaise lounge. She's got the typical fashion doll face but fat thighs, tummy, and arms. The caption says, "There are eight million women who don't look like supermodels and only eight who do," and the back of the card says, "Love Your Body." The postcard is attached to my fridge with a magnet and has been since I bought it, but I don't think I really internalized the message until recently.

I'm sure those of you still reading have wondered what happened to the journal you used to read. Yes, there used to be reports of pounds lost, of minutes walked, of victories both scale and non. It's true: I used to be a weight-loss blogger. I was even recognized for my efforts with a BoB Award plus mentions in a couple of articles about weight loss blogging - believe it or not! And then the success I'd sacrificed so much to achieve slipped away from me slowly, pound by pound, and - although I've whipped up several clever schemes since then - I've never quite gotten back on the horse.

Fast forward to today...still fat, now happily married to a wonderful man and involved in the life of the World's Best Boy Child (that would be Alcott, for those who still remember him), doing rewarding work on behalf of foster children in San Diego and California, too, through the Junior League, about to take possession of the most amazing new townhouse I can imagine, and it still doesn't feel like enough. I try not to beat myself up for my eating (horrible!) or lack of activity (total sloth!) or stressful lifestyle (eat myself into oblivion at the end of a stressful day while procrastinating important non-work/non-Junior League tasks), but it's tough not to. Which, of course, perpetuates the ugly cycle.

This brings me back to my original thought, which was about Loving Your Body. What if I just did one small thing each week that was loving toward myself? Not "stop eating like crap", just, for instance, get eight hours of sleep each night. (I cannot imagine what a proper night's sleep might feel like and we've all read the new research showing a link between not getting enough sleep and obesity, right?) Or eat two servings of fruit at least three times a week (that's one I'm actually doing right now). Small steps that would make me feel better without being obsessed.

So, to start it up, I'm going to try to get eight hours of sleep each day for a week. I'll check in every day to record how I'm doing and feeling, and we'll go from there.

3 comments:

Bluegrass Mama said...

Sleep is one thing I'm usually pretty good about, though I've stayed up too late the last couple of nights. Maybe I'll go climb into my jammies now--9:00 isn't too early, is it?

Shannin said...

The funny thing is, even when you're "skinny" you can still hate your body. Sometimes it is just doing something for yourself - taking care of the little one inside of you.

Mae said...

I'm with ya... this is why I've stopped the ugly dieting cycle and I swear I just can't do it anymore. It's not easy, this concept of intuitive eating, but neither was dieting... and at least now I'm not beating myself up over what no one really manages to do successfully for very long.

Good for you! Sleep would not be where I'd start, since sleep is a demon of mine, but it's a good idea...