Thursday, January 04, 2007

A question from Gloria

Thursday evening. I had my session with Gloria last night and she asked a question that I couldn't answer: Why do you suppose you've lost seven pounds in two weeks, Denise? Why indeed?!! I've been eating anything I want in any amount that I want which, I suppose, is less than it used to be but definitely not "diet" in any sense of that word. I've walked for a total of 50 minutes and at a comfortable, rambling pace. I think TTOM should be arriving next week, so I should be up, not down. I have no idea but Gloria does - she attributes it to the blocked emotional energy I've moved in the last few weeks and she could be right.

Work is stressful and I seem to be handling it better than last year this time (better than two months ago for that matter). My relationship with TCB seems easier, too. There's this sense of calm and peace and wholeness that I can't properly explain, and it makes everything feel easier.

I'm leaving my eating alone because I don't want to fight with the bingeing. I'm exercising when it feels right and good, and at a pace that feels good, and I'm not obsessing over the calories or any other thing. Slow, easy, comfortable; this shouldn't be punishment.

I guess the thing that really hits me between the eyes, though, is the way that everything seems to be working together. Work stress, TCB, Alcott, weight loss/better health, spirituality...they're all connected inside me and they seem to be in harmony for the time being. Things happen, I deal with them, they move on.

I realize this probably doesn't make sense to anyone but me and that's OK. Sometimes I just need to write things down so that I can remember them and try to sort through them for myself.

Last night Gloria also asked me this question: You seem really centered and whole - no drama - so what are you blogging about? Hmmm, perhaps the reason I've been more quiet than usual isn't such a mystery.

5 comments:

Teena said...

Sounds like you are getting balanced. That's a nice way to be.

Jake Silver said...

Well it seems like you've started 2007 off in a great way. Just keep it up.

Amy said...

I know exactly what you are talking about, but don't ask me if I can explain it any better!!!

Shauna said...

:) now that sounds like a great frame of mind for cruising into the new year xxox

Lori said...

Those pesky therapists. Always asking BIG questions. ;-)

I love that you are not fighting the food and the exercising. You're right, it shouldn't be punishment.

You sound like you're in a good place in so many ways. Yay for you! I'm really glad to read this. Have fun this weekend and relax being away from work.