Thursday, June 09, 2005

It's all about me

Thursday night. Isn't the title of this post appropriate? I'm so completely self absorbed sometimes that it takes my breath away, but this time it's referring to the fact that the awkwardness I feel about my life and about being physical with someone (no, I'm not giving him a pseudonym yet...I'm very superstitious) is about me and what's in my head, not because of anything anyone else is giving off. When I feel badly about myself, I project that onto others and the reverse is true, too. Since that's so, I ought to be able to turn this ugly thing around and start thinking about myself in a more positive way, right? Honestly, I believe that just getting back into an exercise routine would go a long way to putting my head into a positive, nurturing frame of mind. Now to get that routine started. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, right? One step doesn't sound so scary.

12 comments:

-E said...

I understand what you mean. I hope you figure out what you need to about yourself and such so you can give him a fun name :)

Michele sent me.

Michael said...

OMG, I'm right with you on the awkwardness thing...and then some.

In my little world, I've kept myself so detached from others for so long--mostly because of the negative way I thought (think) about myself--that the awkwardness I feel around others and my inability to not feel awkward just makes me want to scream sometimes.

Mia Goddess said...

I saw this quote, it is an old Chinese proverb. It says, "The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is today." It definitely gets the point across, no?

Oh, and thanks for the tape tip! Duh. Why don't I think of these things???
- Mia

Rebecca said...

Yep, a single step.
Then another.
Then another.

Come on! You can do it!

Anonymous said...

I so know what you mean sweetie. You just have to have faith in yourself and know that you are your own harshest critic. Also,it does just take one step. I am going to take my first one this weekend! You should, too! It is amazing the effect that exercise has on ones self esteem!
Carrie

sassy little punkin said...

i'm at the point, too, when i need to be pushed towards that first step. i know if i make positive changes that i will feel more positive, about myself and things in general. why is that first step so hard? why are bad habits so comfortable?

bounce said...

Just thought that you should know that after reading you for the better part of a year, you've inspired me to finally get off my big bum and do something with myself.

The Complimenting Commenter said...

A very great outlook. You can manage one step. Then keep going. I'm glad that you have a great mind and have thought things through. Fantabulous job and good luck.

Beatte said...

I do the same thing, even when I feel pretty casual about things going in. I'm not really on a "settle down and have a family" relationship so I don't invest a lot in new relationships that way, but I do put a lot of importance on them because I don't want to have to keep looking, so I keep thinking, "Maybe this will be the last time I have to go through this!"

It's not the guy's fault, it's just my own frustration with dating coming through. If I could relax about those things, I think I would feel more confident and sexy.

Kevin said...

Baby steps are the way to go. Never underestimate 'em. They have a way of growing up into a full scale sprint.

Here via Ms. Michele.

Noames said...

Wow, I got busy at work and come back to all sorts of entries. I'm thrilled to see you so happy about stuff, and super glad that date no. 2 went well.

On the exercise front, I have no advice to offer, since you know all the tricks and strategies better than anyone. So I'll just offer my support and good wishes from this side of the coast.

And if you figure out how to fix the self-perception issuees, feel free to share that knowledge with the rest of us!!!

Plantation said...

Catching up for the week. Boy, I'm so happy for you re: the mystery dude. Really and truly.
:-):-):-):-):-):-):-)