Sunday, May 09, 2004

A new challenge

Sunday morning. I've been giving a lot of thought lately to the "big picture", so much so that I think I'm just psyching myself out of even trying to improve the little picture in the meantime. What I mean is, I'm so focused on losing 114 pounds (more or less) that I've lost sight of the fact that losing just 15 pounds would get me back into my size 24 clothes and 26 pounds would be 10% of my current weight, which has been shown to have significant positive impact on blood sugar and longevity for type II diabetics, of which I am one.

With that in mind, here's the plan:

Between tomorrow and August 9th (13 weeks), I will...

1. Eat my healthy gourmet meals at least 18 out of 21 meals a week. My three meals outside of that parameter will be healthy, both in content and portion size.

2. Exercise at least 270 minutes a week - either cardio or Curves or any combination of the two.

3. Drink at least 100 ounces of water every day. I just don't lose weight as well when I drink less than this amount and it helps me get some extra exercise when I have to run up and down the stairs at work to the ladies' room.

4. Spend at least 30 minutes a day, six days a week, in meditation, prayer, or some kind of quiet time with myself. This could include using my Richard Simmons stretching tape (see #5 below).

5. Stretch out all of my major muscle groups at least twice a week. I've got an old Richard Simmons tape with classical music and no narration and a new Tamilee Webb stretching DVD, so those should keep me interested.

6. Attend at least two OA meetings a week, get a sponsor, and sign up for a concentrated step study group once one opens up nearby. I think that, in all fairness, I've got to give it a fair try, no matter how much some of the tenets of the program bother me. Too many people have found recovery from compulsive overeating through this organization for it not to have merit.

In the middle of this goal (by the July 4th holiday), I'll weigh and measure to see how I'm doing, but I'm not going to do either until then. I don't want this just to be about my weight or my waist size (the only measurement that really means anything to me), because then it's all about the negative and I've got enough negativity in my life without adding to it. I want to celebrate this journey because, God willing, it will be the last time I do this and, quite possibly, the first time I've done anything out of love for myself. Which leads me to #7...

7. I will not speak badly of myself, my struggle to lead a healthy life, my body weight, or any mistakes I may have made in the past. I have a clean, beautiful piece of writing paper sitting in front of me and I intend to write only beautiful things about myself on it. To that end, I'm also going to (temporarily) move away from those who speak or write negatively about any of the above for themselves. I know we each have our own battles to fight in life, and I applaud everyone who is striving to improve themselves. I know that, for me, negativity can start a really bad cycle of self loathing and bingeing, and I'm going to do whatever it takes to get that stopped for me.

I think that's enough for now. Off to enjoy the beautiful day outside and let my mind drift for a while.

Postscript: I'm calling this the "Ten Percent Challenge" - feel free to join up, if you're so inclined!

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